Fear and Loathing in the Backyard. Or in the Freezer...Actually, I'm not exactly sure WHERE I left it... | Do Try This at Home: Fear and Loathing in the Backyard. Or in the Freezer...Actually, I'm not exactly sure WHERE I left it...

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Fear and Loathing in the Backyard. Or in the Freezer...Actually, I'm not exactly sure WHERE I left it...

Yeah, so after our nice little family trip to hell, followed by a trip to Michigan, a stomach bug took out The-Guy and me. It sounds almost benign, doesn't it...stomach bug? Cute almost. Yeah, tell that to the toilet who has put in a bid for early retirement.

But that's okay because school is out! Vacation! Well, for me it is. Someone forgot to tell the business world about summer time and the living being easy...Let's see, fish are jumping, the cotton is high...but The-Guy still has to go to work. Something's wrong here.

I read this a few days ago:
Four states adopt 'no-smiles' policy for liscenses. "Neutral facial expressions" are required at departments of motor vehicles (DMVs) in Arkansas, Indiana, Nevada and Virginia. That means you can't smile, or smile very much. Other states may follow.
Who are these smiling people that make these kinds of rules necessary anyway?!? I can tell you that after waiting in line for FOUR HOURS with two miserable children at my side, there's not a trace of a smile on my license.

My gal and I both thought this was a little on the morbid side:'Cause why wait until you're dead to get to heaven? If you're just about there anyway, you might as well go to an "adult day center" while you wait.

My boy is getting the hang of living in a home with five people:Who would eat a random chunk of brown God-knows-what that's been kicking around the freezer for who the heck knows how long? The answer to this question is not important. What matters is that if you don't want your brown gob eaten and you live with five people, it had better be labeled for cryin' out loud.

Meanwhile Older Gal has given the escape prone Sugar the cat this sage advice: "You don't want to go outside! Outside is disease and danger wrapped in sunshine and noises!"

And so we begin our summer vacation - sunshine and disease for the humans, none for the cat thanks.

13 comments:

Gwen said...

"Outside is disease and danger wrapped in sunshine and noise." - what a great line! And too true.

Christine said...

There are 6 of us. We label odd food all the time. And still, sometimes, Hubby eats out of the dog bowl.

Kristine said...

Blegh, stomach bugs. They suck...or blow as the case may be.

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Gwen - Yes, we're getting some mileage out of that one around here. :-)

Christine - Six is a lot! Five is a lot! Still, so far we're eight months in and none of us has resorted to cat food...

Kristine - Yeah they are all kinds of NOT FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!

ALF said...

Hey, one of those is my state! I had no idea. Strange. Next time I have to renew my license I am going to smile big. I'll let you know what happens.

Ricardo said...

I don't think ANYONE should eat whatever it was in that bag. GROSS!!!

There is a stomach virus going around. It's all over the place. Better than the swine flu. Right?

Bruce said...

"You don't want to go outside! Outside is disease and danger wrapped in sunshine and noises!" .... probably the most classic line I have ever read about summer.

I am sure they don't want you to smile on your drivers license because of facial recognition software implementation. If you are wanted, they scan you license photo and public cameras with software installed can spot you in a crowd......just call me big brother.

Arizaphale said...

Bwhahahaha. You crack me up. Had you ever thought that brown gob may just be a science experiment???? Sheesh Mum.
And as for Adult Day Centres.....kinky.

Maureen said...

Wow hope you're feeling better now. Yuck.

Wow about the Adult day centre name.

Wow about that hunk of whatevertheheckitis. Don't eat it. Unless you want the bug in your stomach to return.

Ewwww....

A Free Man said...

That stuff in the bag may not be food, maybe he's just trying to keep you all from eating a fecal sample or something!

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Alf - Good luck with that! Let me know if you need two miserable children to make you sufficiently grouchy if they out and out insist that you frown!

Don't worry Ricardo, Arizaphale, Maureen, & A Free Man - as soon as he saw the picture my boy went running off to the freezer asking if anyone had eaten his chocolate. Apparently he forgot all about it until he saw the picture up on the blog.

Ricardo - Probably not. Although a nurse friend of mine said they aren't even testing for swine flu anymore, so apparently swine flu has been downgraded.

Bruce - I'm pretty sure you'll have the older gal's undying loyalty now. :-)

Maureen & Arizaphale - the sad part is that van must be the only nice part of the adult day center. We passed it the other day and it's sort of sad looking from the outside, not heavenly looking in the least.

SJ said...

Love the last line... that's the lind of thing that makes me smile when my google reader shows a post from you :)

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Thanks SJ!!!! :-)

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