My living room looks like | Do Try This at Home: My living room looks like

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

My living room looks like

a laundromat threw up in it...my kids got home from camp yesterday YAY!!!!! They both had a great time. Jared only managed to come home with about five items of clothing that weren't his but without a single one of the six towels I sent. Meanwhile I'm trying to find a home for the other 724 items only needed a couple times a year for camp.

The other big event of my day yesterday was divorce court. For all the fear I had of going, it turned out to be intensely, intensely...boring. Comic relief was at hand though, provided by our friendly neighborhood security guards.

Maybe I should watch more movies, but I was unprepared to go through a metal detector on the way in. As they searched through my purse in confusion I offered, "Could it be my pliers?" wondering if perhaps my all-purpose/leatherman type tool had caused the problem. Yes, they were sure that would have been it, but were unable to find the tool. "It's in that pocket." I offered, "But it's in there with..." Too late! Gruff looking security guard's hands are already brandishing my...ahem...feminine products. Luckily my good friend swiped them up quickly & deposited them in her purse (how'd *she* get through so easily?). "Oh well, if this is the worst this day has to offer, I'm off easy," I finally decided.

And while it was the only public humiliation I had to endure that day, it turned out not to be the end of the security road for my purse. They put it back through the machine only to show another item not allowed by the court. This time the guard was quick to find my screwdriver. Well?!? Doesn't everyone carry a screwdriver in her purse? By this time I believe even all three security guards were amused. What can I say? It was obvious that the boyscouts lost out when they refused to let me join back in '79.

3 comments:

The Knotty Girl said...

The boyscouts lost out...BWAHAHA! That is hilarious.

I got caught carrying a fork once. Thats just what a fat girl needs to be caught carrying.

Anonymous said...

Parking at the courthouse - $5

Diet Coke from the vending machine - $1

Lawyer's Fees - $300

Showing up to divorce court with a weapon - Priceless

Anonymous said...

LOL! That's hilarious! I'm glad you found some amusement in what could have been a really bad day. :-)

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