Be Afraid! (of pancake mix, among other things) | Do Try This at Home: Be Afraid! (of pancake mix, among other things)

Friday, November 21, 2008

Be Afraid! (of pancake mix, among other things)

I got an email from my cousin that started out like this -
"This is TRUE--Check it out!"
Well, it's sort of like true. In a way, at any rate.

Subject: Warning-Pancake/Cake Mix

Hi everyone,

A student at HBHS had pancakes this week and it almost became fatal.

His Mom (registered nurse) made him pancakes, dropped him off at school and headed to play tennis. She never takes her cell phone on the court but did this time and her son called to say he was having trouble breathing. She told him to go to the nurse immediately and proceeded to call school and alert the nurse
HELLO! Apparently THIS is the real problem with giving children cell phones. It's not the potential brain tumors - it's that they will call Mom when they should be going directly to the school nurse.

"Hi Mom! Can't breath! What should I do?"
"I dunno honey! How's science class going?"
Besides, do people really make pancakes on a weekday?

Here's more from the email:
"Check the expiration dates on packages like pancakes and cake mixes that have yeast which over time develop spores."
Apparently there's SOMETHING in these mixes killing off these teens and young adults (Snopes says so, so I imagine it's at least partially true), but it shouldn't be yeast. Or if there IS yeast in the pancakes and cake mixes, it's wasted, 'cause last I heard, neither pancakes nor cake required yeast in order to rise.

It's not enough that we have to be afraid of parking lots (poison perfume samples, etc. )and air (yes, the little air bottles you spray to clean your computer key boards can also kill you, or so say the emails). Now we have to be afraid of pancake mix too.

I mean, just for the record, I already WAS afraid of pancake mix, not to mention cake mix. But that was because of the TASTE, not the imaginary yeast. And because God only knows what all they put in there when really all you need for delicious pancakes is flour, eggs, sugar, butter, baking powder, and some milk.

Me, I was afraid of the stuff that's in there on purpose, not the stuff that grew in accidentally. But apparently pancake mix isn't as chock-full-o-preservatives as one might fear.

So anyway, now that I've done my part to raise the general anxiety level about pancake mix, I thought I'd finish up by offering this comforting thought, "At least respect for the sanctity of marriage is alive and well."See?!?! Don't you feel better now?


Christine said...

Nice "plan B" there, if the pancakes don't kill him...

Jill said...

FUNNY Christine!!!!!!!!!!!!!

muirwoodsue said...

That is so funny! Thanks for making me smile this morning!

Anonymous said...

But if it's in an email, it must be true, right? I mean the guy from Nigeria seems so earnest in his search for someone to help launder his money.

Anonymous said...

Perfect excuse NEVER to use pancake mix...or have children.

Lara Neves said...

Now I must go clean my pantry of the 5 boxes of pancake mix. Thanks a lot.

Unknown said...

I think if we gave up enough modern day conveniences phones, mixes, perfume, cars and other (wo)manmade wonders that can kill people we might go back to the good old days when people were killed by nature made wonders like tigers, wolves, snakes etc.

ALF said...

Interesting. I will remember to be afraid of pancakes from now on.

Anonymous said...

Oh good info. Thanks for the warning. Thankfully I'm not (as far as I know) allergic to mold!

Sandra Collins said...

I wonder what they will come up with next?

Jill said...

You're welcome muriwoodsue! (& thanks!)

Kristine - Yeah, I ran into that Nigerian guy last week at the bank and...KIDDING!

Jeff - Well...I got one out of two of those at any rate... :-)

Lara - You're welcome! Just doing my part to rid the world of...ummm...some kind'a something...or another...

SJ - YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 'Cause who the heck wants to die from old age, anyway?!?!?!?!?!

Alf - You can still EAT the pancakes, mind you. Just make sure and take some anti-anxiety medication first, okay?

Derek - Well, be sure and let us know if you develop a pancake allergy...I mean, a mold allergy. Actually don't even - you're probably allergic to all of Houston if you have a mold allergy.

In fact, people in Houston probably don't even have to worry about being allergic to moldy pancakes, because those with allergies are already DEAD from all the mold around here after the hurricane (as if there wasn't enough before)

Sandra - Not sure but whatever it is I'm sure it will totally cause cancer and hives, among other things. :-0

DJ Kirkby said...

Hah! You are funny. Do these email scaremongers not know that yeast is a spore?

Anonymous said...

Pancake mix? I admit, I've used pancake mix in the past. Don't have any right now as..I don't make pancakes. I DO like Jiffy corn muffin mix and making pancakes outta that. Pancakes are too floppy. Not much into floppy (hehehe).

I like textured foods - so wheat toast, oatmeal, scones (the real ones, not the cake bricks).

I do enjoy pancakes with raspberry jam and if the pancakes maybe have some oatmeal mixed in.

But after all that, may as well have French toast.

I don't have kids so I dodged the killing them with pancake mix bullet. IN my case, if I had them, they'd probably be choking on a scone.

Jill said...

DJ - email scaremongers! That's the term I've been looking for! I think, actually, that most people send these around with the idea that they are helping people. But sheesh! How many different things can we think of to be scared of, anyway?

Oh Ms.Q, you'll have to come over for pancakes if you ever come to Texas! My pancakes are not floppy at ALL! Actually, my pancake griddle died a slow, agonizing death before I moved here and for awhile there my pancakes were a little on the iffy side.

But Razor bought this new griddle when we moved into the house and everything comes out SO even and nice and delicate and yummy!!!! So let me know when you're in town and I'll make you some! :-)

Noelia said...

Too funny! I have some of that Bisquick pancake mix and I'll be thinking twice before I use it.

Janet said...

Good grief. If I wasn't already worried enough about Thanksgiving dinner...

Maureen said...

Good thing I make my 'cakes (pan and otherwise) from scratch.

If they had something in there to kill ya, it would have been put there intentionally.... ;)

Jill said...

Noelia - Yeah! Make sure & be careful with that stuff! The dreaded killer Bisquick is known to be especially lethal...KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!!

Janet - Was it pancakes for Thanksgiving dinner at your house? YUM!!!!!!!!!!! Kidding!!!! I'm pretty sure I've been over to your blog though since Thanksgiving & you seem to have lived. :-)

Funny Maureen!!! And let's hear it for from scratch non-killer pancakes!


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