How One of My Kids Might Have Turned Out Semi-Okay So Far Despite me. | Do Try This at Home: How One of My Kids Might Have Turned Out Semi-Okay So Far Despite me.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

How One of My Kids Might Have Turned Out Semi-Okay So Far Despite me.

Once upon a time that handsome teenage boy-o-mine in the sidebar used to be a cute baby that I apparently never listened to.The person next to him is the Sweet Pea, who more or less always demanded that you listen to her.

So one day I'm pulling out of the drive through ATM and I hear a little voice from the back seat,

"Ah LEDDER! Ah ledder Mama! Mama! It wote you ah LEDDER!!!! Aaaaah LEDDERRRRRRRR!"

I wondered what the baby was squawking about, but not enough to turn back around to see. If I HAD pulled back around to see, I would have found out that the letter he was talking about was the machine spitting back out my ATM card. But instead, I got a phone call from the bank later.

The second time we were at the grocery store. Kroger had bulk bins back then and I began my shopping trip by scooping out some kind of nuts or trail mix or whatever when I suddenly screamed and dropped my bag of bulk food. There were BUGS in the bin!

I recovered from the trauma, did the rest of my shopping, checked out, and suddenly realized I couldn't find my car keys. I searched the store, checking the aisles bemoaning our fate of obvious food poisoning as our milk, eggs, or whatever perishables I had in the cart got warmer and warmer.

In desperation, I asked the baby in the cart, "Jared, did you see what happened to my keys?" As if none of the frantic searching had even occurred, he calmly answered, "I think you put them by the peanuts."

I hadn't, in fact, "put them" by the peanuts. I had dropped them when I screamed. There they were right there on the floor by the bulk bins and we were free to go home in time not to spoil the food and end up in the hospital from rotten eggs.

Happily ever after. Except, I probably still don't listen to him enough.

16 comments:

The Ceol Mors said...

An observant one that J.

Annemarie O. said...

Love it!

Reds said...

Guess you should listen more to your son!! And the bugs in the nuts... ewwwwww!!

MarkD60 said...

I thought he was saying "A letter! I wrote you a letter"

Yeah, when I was a kid, I knew everything and was always trying to save my parents asses too. They never listened. Wish I could see with such clarity now!

I used to know all about relationships until I got married too. Now I know nothing about them!

Tracie said...

Funny story!

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Cid - Yeah, he is, isn't he? :-)

Thanks Annemarie!

Reds - It was really gross! I guess that's why Kroger doesn't have bulk bins anymore.

Mark - Me neither. Well, I know less and less about anything the older I get.

Thanks Tracie!

Staci said...

He's one smart cookie! Gross on the bugs!

BloggerFather said...

AND he dresses like he's got it all figured out.

Arizaphale said...

In honour of the fact that you honour your son today...my word verification is ......SPERM!!!!!! Seriously!!!!

PS: love that kid!

Kerry McKibbins said...

Ok, he is adorable.
Love him.

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Thanks Staci!

Blogger Father - Would that be the one sock on/one sock off? Or the diaper? :-)

Funny Arizaphale!

Thanks Kerry!

Marlene said...

Too funny! And your son sure is adorable - then AND now.

Slyde said...

when i read posts like this, i just want to run home, take my little one out of school and hug him for the rest of the day :)

Tracy said...

Awww what a cutie he was too :)
My middle daughter is the quiet, non demanding one....thankfully because her older sister is still demanding at 22, lol.

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BrightenedBoy said...

Both of those pictures are just adorable and the one with him in the sunglasses is just ridiculous in the best way.

It's funny how children seem to know things. They have a kind of wisdom that adults seem to forget.

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