So...if you go, I hope you have a good time and all. But I might not be there because it's too frightening for me.*
Rumor has it that weddings are scary because of the whole commitment thing. But as we all know, it's not the commitment that's scary. It's the invitations.
Well, that's not exactly right. Invitations in and of themselves are only paper. I even like to make cards and stuff that look very similar to invitations, see?
I even made a convenient card about death (more commonly known as a "condolence card"):But hopefully I don't have to use it. Or I would hope that, except really The-Guy-Who-Knows-A-Song-About-A-Chicken already used it.
So if I'm not scared of putting death on a pretty card, then you'd think a wedding card would be no big deal, right?
Right, because look, I already made a couple of congratulations for being married cards too:It turns out it's not the invitations themselves that are so scary, because those things can only give you a paper cut. It's how to send the invitations to the right people. "The right people" being, of course, the people that actually want to be there and/or who would be upset if they weren't there.
Oh, and also presents are also very, very scary. Because we already have three times more stuff than any five people need. But they told me at work that we can ask people to donate to charity instead. So that's way less scary. Sort of. I think.
Silly me, I thought getting married could be no big deal if I didn't buy a fancy dress. But it will be okay. As I understand it, we still get to end up married no matter how many different ways we screw up and make people mad. Sort of. I think. I hope.
*I'm KIDDING! I'm totally going to be there.