And So That's Why I Shouldn't See Children's Movies | Do Try This at Home: And So That's Why I Shouldn't See Children's Movies

Saturday, January 16, 2010

And So That's Why I Shouldn't See Children's Movies

Here's a picture of us having some family togetherness. Or maybe family apartness. In any case, notice the close proximity of the people yet complete lack of interaction:No, we really did talk to each other that day. Or at least my Sweet Pea chatted with The-Guy-Who-Knows-A-Song-About-A-Chicken over facebook.

Here's a picture of me and The-Guy at blues bar in town:It was taken by a friendly drunk woman from California who was in town visiting her sister. I say she was drunk. It's possible that she was just naturally boisterous, friendly, and unobservant.

There was a guy there dancing on roller skates - not just shuffling around as if he were dancing and hoping not to fall, but really, really dancing.Here's a restaurant sign my dad and I saw in New Hampshire:I think Dad figured it was all the same food, because his comment was, "Just close your eyes and pretend!"

We saw that sign on our way back from seeing that Avatar movie. I've heard people liked it, hated it, thought the story was too simple...

Me, I got all upset because I didn't realize that a movie rated for children would be so violent. There were animals burning alive and spears piercing people's chests and stuff.

"BUT if they had showed a BOOB with a nipple, then it would have been rated R!" I declared loudly in the lobby.

So then of course, I announced equally loudly that in retaliation I was going to start showing my kids porno. It's the only logical solution, after all.

About a week later my friend Beth told me that there actually were several naked alien boobies in the movie, complete with nipples. I just hadn't noticed them, because I was either too entranced by the story or too agitated by the violence.

But I feel much better just knowing they were there, and that the movie wasn't promoting violence over sex. Because why shouldn't children see both?!?!*

I had a totally appropriate and clever ending somehow fit in the blues bar and movie and wrapped it all very perfectly. But of course I forgot that ending. I'll just have to go with the obvious: I should should see less children's movies and more blues bars.

*I realize that it was rated PG-13, but to me, any movie that spawns a line of toys and video games is being marketed to children. Also, I'm totally kidding about children seeing both.


Anonymous said...

Love the family apartness picture! Usually here we have John watching the World Poker Tour on TV, me on the computer, a kid on each TV upstairs, two kids on their I-touch thingies, and one final kid complaining that there's nothing to do. Hahaha.... --Debbie

Tracy said...

Your family togetherness kind of reminds me of ours.
Mind you Hubby and girls do talk to each other when they are playing video games.

People in the Sun said...

You had me at "naked alien boobies." Finally I can watch my Smurfs fantasy in 3-D?

Unknown said...

So... you prefer blue grass to a blue ass? *

(there was a lot of that too if you looked under the tails.)

*Couldn't resist.

Jill said...

Debbie, It was actually a nice morning. For awhile. Until I realized everyone's eyes and brains had been velcroed to a screen for what seemed like an unreasonably long time and declared it about to drive me stark raving mad and kicked everyone off to go do something else...

Tracy - Yeah. We were talking to each other some too. Some. Not enough to stop me from going off the deep end and kicking everyone off though. :-0

People & SJ - You guys are TOO FUNNY!!!!!!! And yes, SJ, I do like bluegrass. Prefer it even, I imagine. :-)

Arizaphale said...

Great picture of you guys in the bar! Covet the roller skating talent. Have still to see Avatar.

Kerry McKibbins said...

Your family pic looks like our family pic.
I have no interest in seeing that movie, none, but the boys do. The MUST see it in IMAX. Blech.

Janet said...

I could take the same picture around here of us "together" on our laptops. Thank goodness for FB or we pretty much wouldn't talk at all! Sometimes I think we are the very definition of dysfunctional!

Haven't seen Avatar yet but when I do, I'll be on alert!

John said...

Surprised me that the movie only rated that high. It's a sci fi military invasion movie with every guy wanting to see some adult version bluesmurfette action goin' on they missed out in their youth!

I think Wizards around 1977 got an R rating. So did Heavy Metal. But Wizards didn't do half as much as The Animatrix did in some of it's short stories.

I can relate to the 'Stop It I Say' moment. I quietly turn off the wifi at the router and run to the kitchen acting like I'm doing something before my kids open their doors.

Luckily they don't read blogs. :)

Bruce Johnson said...

The picture of 3 people on laptops all in the same room is priceless.

As for Avatar, be thankful, you don't see the DVD directors cut that is coming out. It has the Na'vi sex scene that was deleted. Talk about freaky alien sex!

Jill said...

Thanks Arizaphale! Yeah, the guy on the roller skates was really something else!

Kerry - It really wasn't a bad story at all, and I'm not even particularly interested in movies. I just wasn't prepared for the violence. Naive I guess...

Janet - I dunno, from the looks of your scrapbook pages, it seems like you guys must get out quite a bit. Or at least your daughter does! :-)

John - Yeah, good thing! :-) Also, I think the ratings have changed a lot since those movies. They have the same letters (with the addition of PG-13), but a PG movie from 1977 is not the same as a PG movie from today.

Bruce - I have nothing against movies depicting violence OR freaky alien sex (ok, I've never seen a movie depicting freaky alien sex, so I don't really know). It's the fact that they're marketed to six year olds that gets me all up in arms.

A Free Man said...

It's rated the equivalent of R over here. We're more tolerant of sex, but less so of violence. That makes me happy.

Unknown said...

I thought having no TV was supposed to promote close interaction with all in the household and free people's minds from silly things. LOL! I couldn't resist but if it ain't TV then its going to be computers, if not that then texting on the cell phone and if nt that then something else. I can not resist teasing you on this, the picture says it all.

I would have loved to have seen the dude dancing on roller skates. I mean that's not a common skill. what inspires one to do that?

You sound like an old lady over Avatar. LOL! You know there are are toys of R-rated films also. I kid you not. I played video games as a kid based on R-Rated flicks. Saw them too. They were violent.

PG-13 is violence with not much blood, little to no swearing and a few other factors. But most PG-!3 action films will have plenty of violence just not the blood curdling kind.

Jill said...

A Free Man - Yeah, see that's how I think it should be here, too.

Ricardo - Yeah, pathetic, huh? What I didn't capture in the picture was that just prior to getting behind the camera, I was composing the post in question and also on a screen.

And yeah, I probably did sound like an old lady. EXCEPT, I was the only old lady in the lobby declaring loudly that I was going to show porno to my children! :-) :-) :-) I need to just stay away from children's movies, period.


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