Thursday, October 04, 2007
The Secret Life of Toothpaste
I didn't actually read the Secret Life of Bees. Well, I read about half of it before deciding that if I were going to get all depressed about someone's miserable life, I may as well be feeling for real people. It's a GREAT book though! Or at least the first half is really great. Anyway, I never found out about what bees do in their secret lives, but I've recently discovered the secret life of toothpaste.
Some time ago my friend Dan mentioned having CDs regrooved. I was astonished. CDs can be regrooved?!?!?! Dan is, among other things, a DJ. So I felt like he was a fairly credible source for the dirt on CDs.
I was ready to set the world on fire with this new knowledge! Who it was I was planning to enlighten I can't really say, since as I've mentioned none of my friends are into that kind of stuff. I planned on interrogating him relentlessly when I suddenly realized that I had burned the CD in question from itunes. Why go through all the hassle of regrooving when I could just burn another twelve cent CD?
I've since gotten a lot lazier about putting new CDs into itunes and have had opportunity to rethink the whole regrooving thing. No point in suggesting I download directly from the internet - I still use a cast iron pan for cryin' out loud! I'm not exactly what marketers call an "early adopter."
More recently another friend (also named Daniel) and I were talking about CDs. I briefly wondered if men named Daniel might have an inordinate knowledge of the workings of CDs. But then I remembered that about 1/3 of the men I know are named Dan or Daniel and that it stands to reason that a couple of them would have an area of expertise in common. In any case, this particular Daniel knows a lot about a lot of things, so he seems like a credible source for information on...well...any number of subjects.
For whatever reason, Daniel was telling me that CDs have a thin layer of plastic over the music which led to him telling me the meaning of life for toothpaste. I have used windex, hot water, cotton, and breath among other things, but nothing works like toothpaste for breathing new life into a skipping CD!
My favorite CD is now scratch-free! Forget Jesus is Magic (although it's a really funny movie, if you like demented humor). Toothpaste is magic! Also, I'm changing careers to become a guidance councilor for common household products.